An unexpected, emotional side effect of weight loss ..

As I've spoken about on this blog before I am the mama to many babies in heaven. Some through miscarriage, some through failed ivfs, some through loss of our embryos in the thawing process. As a mama it hurt that there was nothing tangible I could hold onto to remind me of my babes. I have no ultrasound photo - no birth certificate - no grave to weep at.

So one day - when feeling blue I ordered a set of stackable rings to wear when I want to remember my babes. The words can be hidden so I am the only one who knows they have a special meaning. And they are something I can leave my girl so she knows mama tried to get her a sibling when she is older.




Each ring is different.
The first states "Miss you so much, love you more"
The second "longing to hold you in heaven"
and the third has a bible verse reference to a verse that I have held onto -Lamentations 3 :19-24

I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.
20 I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.
21 Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

All lovely. But the problem is - when they arrived I could not get them onto my fingers. So I wore them on a chain ... and then eventually left them safe inside my jewellry box. Hardly the reminder I was after.

Well now they fit! And I can hold my memories ... and my hopes for the future close to me again.
It was a sweet sweet moment for me.